you are my center when I spin away

*Nsync Days

My sister and I were talking about our old fangirling days. I remembered that *Nsync was probably my first fandom, and certainly my first experience with fanfiction. I used to write my online friends and me into stories about us meeting the boys. There was never any kissing. Probably because I was 12 and would have been content just to get to say hello to them, truth be told.

I also remember using all of our printer paper to print out a fic where the *Nsync members were superheroes. There was artwork for each chapter. They rode on a giant pug at one point. They teamed up with the Backstreet Boys who were only seemed evil because Brian or Nick's girlfriend had been captured by the bad guys or something like that. Double agents! Christina Aguilera was a literal genie in a bottle, and the villain was called The Corpulence and eventually turned out to be Lou Pearlman.

Epic.

RP

I've been doing livejournal (and insanejournal, and just journal in general I suppose) based roleplaying games for about... 3 or 4 years now. Not as long as other people, I'm sure, but long enough to miss it when I don't really have it. It started with Harry Potter fandom, and I honestly loved being with hih_thegame. There were definitely some hard moments for me. The first mass exodus where all my friends left to make their own game and didn't invite me. Then being chosen as mod and turned against by the new players for trying to help everyone thread together. Then accidentally causing drama when I left because one player was out of control and standing up to her ended up being more a mistake than a relief. But it made me fall in love with writing, and I still talk to a few people I met there. I wish I had more positive memories, but overall the experience was good.

I took a break for awhile and then joined a game that was totally original. Not for any fandom at all. It was a small group of people, I only wrote with about two people, had a million characters and loved every one of them because they were mine and no one else's. Then my life got complicated and I faded out. I still feel guilty for it, but I guess nothing's meant to last.

There was one game with greek gods and goddesses that I was addicted to, but died within about the first month of opening. After that I figured I'd probably never go back to RP again.

But then the thought of playing Arashi just got me really excited. I love writing them in fiction, so why not RP with them as well? But the game I got to join died in about 3 or 4 months, because the mods stopped caring and everyone but Arashi disappeared. It's disheartening, even if you still have the other Arashi members, when everything feels like something that's moved on without you. When the place is dead and only you are trying to milk it while you can.

So I started a new place, deliciae_rp. It's not really generating a lot of interest, even though I had really hoped it would.

Nothing else grabs me. I'm not sure what I'm doing. Sometimes I think going back to original characters would be better in the long run.

An incident that could be coincidence or could be ghosts:

I was upstairs thinking that I really, really needed a drink of water. I had too much white cheddar popcorn and my mouth was kind of angry.

I was afraid to go downstairs because the floors creak and make a lot of noise, and the middle of the house is one big, open area with a door off to the side that leads to my parents' bedroom. I didn't want to wake them because that would be bad news bears.

But I couldn't take it. So I went downstairs all stealthily, and when I got to the kitchen? The cupboard for the cups was wide open, and sitting underneath it was the water pitcher.

... O_O

I just had a dream that I was on a college campus taking summer courses. And I was Ninomiya Kazunari.

The "set up" if you will, or what my brain knew, was that Ohno, Nino, and Aiba had been made to join Kanjani8, who were actually a group of American guys I've not seen before. We were all hanging out in someone's dorm while my friend Erin explained to me who each guy was and because I was new I kept getting hit on by them and it was kind of nice even though I was technically Nino (and not hit on by the Arashi guys, damn). They started to sing and I was thinking, "Ohno and Aiba are amazing, they fit in just fine because they sing so well, they're maybe even better than the others."

But the whole time I kept thinking how horribly depressing it was that they had been separated from Jun and Sho. And I was like, "What are Jun and Sho going to do, be like Tackey and Tsubasa?"

So I afterward I talked with Aiba and Ohno and was like, "You know that Jun can get a bit nasal and they use Sho for rap more than they let him sing. It's going to be a disaster, why did they do this?"

Suddenly we're at a huge formal party and Step and Go is playing through a loud speaker, which is PISSING ME OFF because how can they even play Arashi anymore after what they've done to us? Well, even worse, a performance of Love So Sweet starts up on the main floor (we were wandering around the second) and it's Jun, Sho, and some new guy (some curly haired American guy, stupid brain) and the three of us CANNOT stand for that. So we start singing as loud as we possibly can, joining the other two. Sho and Jun look back at us kind of watery eyed, like they missed us, so we just sing even more loudly. Then it gets awkward, because Ohno is supposed to be singing and it's clear the new person is supposed to be taking his place, so Ohno sings his part anyway, fighting so hard to show that no one else should be singing his parts and the new guy keeps going and just sort of stares at him.

We all get pulled away, kicking and screaming as we go. Then suddenly I'm in a classroom again and the professor is some Spanish woman who is freaking out because she thinks Ohno Satoshi just killed himself with rat poison. I'm dying inside.

Then I wake up.


... GOD DAMN IT BRAIN STOP WRITING BADFIC. Also, why do I always become one of the members in my dreams? I want to see them all. :(

I'm so glad I sometimes sleep in my clothes. Last night I did and I think it was the right decision, given that I fell asleep around 4 AM and my mom came into my room at about 8 AM telling me that there would be plumbers coming to the house sometime during the day and they'd call first. They called at 9 AM and arrived in like... 10 minutes and I hadn't even rolled out of bed yet.

And while the majority of their visit was the one guy cracking really stupid jokes at me, "You're still sitting in the kitchen? Is this your work station?" and (at the plastic tree in our formal living room) "Interesting thing about that tree, it never grew, it'll never die."

Wow. Deep.

Toward the end of the visit I was trying to write in stuff on the check and he was STARING REALLY OBVIOUSLY AT MY BOOBS. Just to check and make sure I wasn't imagining things, I said "Who do I make this out to?" and his response was "Uh... m'am? What?" *facepalm*

Then he looked over at a picture we had on the fridge of my cousin's baby. My cousin is around 30 or so now and he's over in Iraq for the millionth time (he's a Sgt), and he calls sometimes to talk to my brother and scolded me for watching chick flicks and not some Christopher Walken film (he still sees me as a 10 year old, so it felt weird to him to even be having the conversation), but ANYWAY, his baby girl is the most adorable thing ever and is named Hayley, a name I always wanted when I was younger (everyone had that name they wanted to change theirs to, right? That was mine.) The plumber tried to strike up conversation again.

Plumber: Is that your baby?
Me: Oh, no way. I'm too young for kids.
Plumber: I never thought I could do it, never thought I'd get to have a kid. That DNA testing was the best thing that ever happened to me.

...

This was my morning. ♥

All it took was 2 people to say "I think your fic can be confusing" and now I'm flailing around going "MUST FIX THIS IMMEDIATELY!"

Unfortunately I'm exhausted. My hands are falling asleep as I type and I haven't even gotten my Shukudai fix yet.

And 2 people also thought they didn't deserve my friendship. D: Whuuut? I'm not that awesome, no need to worry. Seriously. I'm lamer than a lame thing at a lame party wearing lame clothes. Did you SEE me choke on that potato chip? Really.

But there's just so much love going around because of this anon thing and not hate and that's what I like to see. My friends list is really just the best thing ever.

I had to see my Philosophy professor in NORMAL CLOTHES today DUN DUN JUN. Seriously, it was a little disturbing. Especially when he gave me that head nod o'greeting and my dad thought he was someone in my class. Please always wear your corduroy jacket with the elbow patches and piss me off with talk about GOD EXISTS BECAUSE HE'S IN UR BRAINZ. Oh wait, you cannot, because I'm HOME NOW and I'll never be back in that class again. ♥

Anyone remember that corduroy bear? What was his name? The Velveteen Rabbit? Velveeta cheese? Vegeta? VAG-

Off track.

My father and I listened to the classic rock station on the way home this evening and one song blew my mind. I found it on youtube, and you know what? THE MOST ALBINO GUY TO HAVE EVER ALBINO'D - HAVING SEX WITH A STRAP ON KEYBOARD. While another guy looks at him creepily and humps his guitar. You don't have to watch the whole thing, but THIS SHIT IS HARDCORE and I want to play music again. Inspiiiiiiiired. *cackle*

OH, AT LEAST WAIT UNTIL YOU GET TO THE PART WHERE EVERYTHING SOUNDS LIKE LASERS. WHOOOSH WHOOSH SHOOO ZAP.

That's no longer a shuuuuu sound, it's Sho's name made long like "Shooooooo - let me have your babies" and it doesn't quite belong with lasers. SO TIRED. Ending this before it gets any less coherent.

I have been doing nothing but write and write and write for weeks. Papers, final exam essays, fiction, and so on. Like, my hand has been cramping up the past few days and making it hard to type.

Yesterday (I think it was yesterday, I've seriously lost all concept of time), I couldn't sleep because my mind kept trying to write a Pride & Prejudice Arashi AU with Jun as Mr. Darcy and Nino as Elizabeth Bennet. And while I am totally going to do this, it was not a very good time for it. Also, Ohno kept bouncing around as Mr. Collins and then Georgiana and my mind couldn't make itself up so it was kind of annoying. But having fluffy Sakuraiba with Sho!Jane and Aiba!Bingley is exciting too. So EPIC MATSUMIYA FIC in the future.

But tonight I opened up my WIP Ohmiya and just went, "No."

Because right now it feels like a chore rather than a stress relief. So I'll come back to it when finals are over and summer is here (a few days, not exactly a huge procrastination, har). Instead I am going to re-watch Hana Yori Dango like I've been longing to lately. I think I deserve a tiny break. :)

AND NOW I AM MAKING A LATE NIGHT TRIP TO THE STORE JUST BECAUSE I'M CRAVING JUICE LIKE A MOTHERFUCKERRRR.

(OH DW, I feel so sorry for you, I'm abusing you already.)

For the past few nights, every time I go to study I end up singing the Gullah Gullah Island theme song instead. Also, for anyone who was unaware, I have a tendency to get really aggressive verbally when I've reached exhaustion. Sure, this is in a playful way, but it can lead to things like:

[ from an ichat ]
I was, at 3 in the morning, singing "LET'S ALL GO TO GULLAH GULLAH ISLAND"
and my roommate was studying with me. and she was like "I want you dead" and I was like "I bet you do you whore. Stop distracting me, I'll fuck this sentence structure up"
she was unphased
And I kept spouting nonsense because I'd have a practice sentence like "Someone in the government is looking for you" and I'd be like "Someone in the government is looking for YOU BINYAH BINYAH. POLLIWOGS AIN'T GOT RIGHTS"
lol, it made syntax fun

vivamyself

I'm putting my fiction there in the future. Possibly other things as well, I have not yet decided. I'm just going with the flow. Check out the fic index I made today. Not only is it shiny and vain (YAY MATSUJUN COMM NAME YAY FOR SHOWING OFF MY STUFF), it is also freaking LOADED. I do too much writing. I should be studying with all this free time.

Like now. No, definitely now. :D

Can I use DW like Twitter but without the character limit?

Conversation with my roommate -

Her: You like Japanese things, right? Boybands?
Me: Yeeeeeeees?
Her: Have you heard of S.M.A.P?
Me: *blink* Yes.
Her: Did you know one of their members got arrested for being naked?
Me: Ah, well... yes.
Her: When he commented on it, apparently he said, "What's wrong with being naked?"
Me: ...
Her: Now they're selling t-shirts that say "What's wrong with being naked?"
Me: No.
Her: I want one.
Me: ...
Her: It's funny because it's printed on clothing.

One more week and I'm home. ♥

I am supporting Crazy Moon because I am in favor of...



✹ NEEN EXPLOSION!!

FWAAAAH, it is FABULOUS (more on the letter 'F' later).

THEORIES

The Origin of the Term "Boobs" for BASOOMZ: Back in the days of yore (and quite possibly still today, though perhaps infrequent), it was not uncommon to call someone a boob if you thought they were being a complete idiot. Example:

"Is it possible that the chaotic nature of the world on a micro level influences the way things operate on a macro level?"

"Did someone say cat macros!?"

"Oh Johnny, don't be such a boob! And yes let's look at cat macros nao..."

So really, it would follow from this that after numerous times of calling men boobs as they sputtered and stammered in front of women with large breasts, the name started being applied to the source of the stupidity and caught on from there. Women have boobs because men are boobs.

Note - an alternative theory that I stole from Yahoo!Answers (WHERE THE KNOWLEDGE COMES FROM o:) is that it comes from the German word for TEAT. TIIIIIIIIT. Man, boobs are hilarious, don't ask me why.


Why There Are So Many Redheads Here in Virginia: (I had to come up with a theory for this because I wanted to know the reason for me no longer being special, damn it.)

John Smith had sex with someone a long time ago. Now the genes are just hanging around. THANKS A LOT, OLD FAT BEARDY REDHEAD JOHN SMITH. WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE BEEN A STRAPPING YOUNG LAD OF BLONDE AND MEL GIBSON? Damn you.

Why the Second Book Was Called 'If You Give a Moose a Muffin': The first was 'If you give a mouse a cookie' for anyone unaware of this classic piece of children's literature. Clearly the concept behind these books originated as animals receiving food they are not normally presented with, the juxtaposition of neglected creatures and delicious human snacks (not snacks made OF human, that's a whole new ballgame) makes for a titillating (BOOB JOKE!) read.

Then they discovered that you can get people to buy shit with alliteration. MOOSE AND MUFFIN. PIG AND PANCAKE. These books will fly off the shelves. And really, I don't think it's wrong. Alliteration is everywhere and people buy into it.

Look at FREEDOM FRIES. Or FIVE DOLLAR FOOT LONGS (bitch at me later when the song is in your head, I know the dangers of even starting a sentence with five dollar now). However, this brings me to a whole new theory about it being even MORE deadly when the letter F is involved because people just like the letter F.

FUCKING FANTASTIC FUN FFFFYEAAAAAAH.

Fail!Sho. FLAILING.

♥ The End.